Nameless fic and a rant
by Snape No Koibito
Summary: This is another D/S that features other pairings, and was written to piss off a certain reviewer. This is slash!


Severus sat at his desk, watching the seventh year Gryffindors leave. He was quite happy to be getting rid of this lot for the day. The Weasley twins seemed to be coming up with more and more pranks as of late, and it made him extremely nervous. Not that he would ever let them know it, of course. He turned to watch them meander out of his class, hand in hand. Severus didn't think that anybody would ever be able to comprehend the depths of the bond between them. With a mental slap in the face, he turned and went to work on preparing for his next class, which was just as bad, if not worse, than the last one. He had the Gryffindor and Slytherin fifth years.  
He'd hoped that this year, it would finally be a split class. The two groups were constantly at each other's throats. This year they would being to learn some rather dangerous potions, and he knew that if they were separated he would have no problems in getting them to learn more. Snape would, once again, have to be twice as strict if he was to have any hope of all of them passing the O.W.L.s. He'd never had a student fail them, but he had a feeling that might change with this year. He stared expressionlessly at them all as they took the usual seats, Slytherin on one half, Gryffindor on the other.  
"I wouldn't get too comfortable," Snape said. "This year you'll have a seating chart, to make sure you behave well enough to learn what you need to. I've never had a student fail the O.W.L.s before, but I have a feeling that will change if I don't do something about it. At the first table, Granger and Longbottom. Behind them... Finnegan and Crabbe, and behind them, Ms. Brown and Ms. Bulstrode. Next to Granger and Longbottom, Potter and Malfoy. Behind them I want Patil and Parkinson. Stop grumbling, Pansy, that will get you a detention. Behind them I want Goyle and Thomas. Next to Potter and Malfoy... Weasley and Nott..." he finished the rest of the list without having to threaten and bully more than once, pleased with the amount of emotional turmoil he'd managed in 5 minutes time.   
Something was irking him though. Malfoy was throwing something over at Weasley's desk. "Malfoy," he snapped, "recite the 12 uses of dragon's blood." Malfoy looked positively frightened.   
"I can't remember them."  
Snape resisted the sudden unexplainable urge to smirk. "Very well then. Longbottom?" Neville was able to recite them all in order with no help. Everyone looked at him as though he had just asked for a lightly grilled kappa. "Repeat that." Neville did it again, and now they were all looking at him as though he had asked for a lightly grilled kappa with French fries. "That... that's correct."  
"Professor," came Granger's voice, "didn't you say that if he could answer something right you'd give him 100 points?"  
"Yeee-esss..." he said slowly. He could see where this was going. This was the path to insanity. Oh well. "100.... P-p-p-p-points to Gryffindor."   
The Slytherins were all glaring at him with anguish and disgust. With a sigh, he launched into the lesson.  
  
======================  
  
Severus gave a sigh of relief as the class left, the Slytherins all giving him dirty looks. He would have to go and speak to his House later, and clean up the mess. He had just turned back to grading papers with a mental shrug when he heard footsteps as someone entered the room. "Severus?" came a quiet voice. He looked up.  
"Hi, Albus," he greeted with a weak smile. "Can I help you with something?"  
The aforementioned Headmaster moved behind him, gently rubbing his shoulders. "I hear you gave 100 points to one Neville Longbottom." Severus and arched into the welcome touch.   
"I promised them 100 points if he answered something right."  
Albus chuckled and sat down on the Potions Master's lap, kissing him softly and briefly as Severus' arms enfolded him. "You've managed to shock the whole school. You're students appear to have gone brain dead. I think you owe them an explanation.   
The Potions Master smiled at the man on his lap and snuggled him closer. He absently twirled Albus' beard around his finger as they kissed. They didn't mind the age difference. It only went to show others how pure and strong their love was. Albus was 120 years his elder. They broke apart at the sound of footsteps and the Headmaster slid off his lover's lap. "Later," he promised, and slipped silently out of the office as Malfoy entered, to find his Head of House watching the doorway with a silly lovesick smile on his face. "Um... Professor?"  
Snape jumped. "What is it?" He glowered at the teen for having interrupted a special 'moment'.   
Malfoy retaliated with an absolutely adorable pout. "I need some advice. It seems I was right in coming to you after all." Snape motioned for him to sit in the chair across from him. "See, I like this person. A lot. But see, they're in Gryffindor, and Father would NEVER approve of it..."  
"So who exactly is this girl?"  
Draco looked down at his lap. "It's not a girl." Severus' eyes went wide.   
"Don't tell me it's Potter."  
"It's not."  
"Weasley?"  
"No."  
"Then who?"  
Draco sighed. "Finnegan. Seamus Finnegan."  
"You're right. He won't. A half-blood and a Malfoy? A homosexual relationship too? No, he'd kill you first. But if you like, I won't say anything to him." He had the rare pleasure of seeing Draco's eyes light up and tried to defend himself as Draco hugged him. "MALFOY!!!!" Draco let go and headed for the door, bouncing. "Draco?"  
"Yeah?"  
"Try not to get hurt this time, okay?"  
Draco grinned a shit-eating grin and left.  
  
  
~End... or is it?~  
  
Answer to a review and a rant: This is from: Hey...: Well... if it asn't for the horrible pairing that Dumbledore/ Snape make... and the obvious stupidness of Ron's betraying Harry... it could be a good story  
  
Dear Hey...,  
I think you should rot in Hell. Give good reason why you don't like it, and I'll still bash your head in. Ron has a horrible inferiority complex. I think perhaps you should open up your mind and get real. And please. Learn to spell. Honestly... asn't? What the hell kind of word is that?  



End file.
